Blank; I've come to a blank. I know I have so much to say and so much to feel but for some reason I just can't seem to get the flow going. So much to chew on lately. So much I over analyze and over stress myself with. It's all rather ridiculous, really. Most things in life I don't have the patience to wait around for to come to me- so I go out and get it. For some reason I find my head & heart telling to go for it but my feet and my mouth won't respond, they don't listen. Somehow I am still holding myself back. Ha how do you hold yourself back in one of the most significant areas of your life? I really do confuse myself. Live with no regrets is what I plan on doing- and will do- but when I stop to think of all the time I am wasting and all the opportunities I allow to slip from my fingertips I wonder if I really am as brave as I think I am to say "I don't fucking live with regret". Hesitation leads to regret. I started out with I strong will and a hard head and slowly I am allowing those to fade out and fade away. Absolutely ridiculous. I need to make the jump. I need to stop this dance I've started. Pacing back and forth will never lead you on an adventure. Life's short and passes by too quickly for me to still be clinging to my old manners of "what if I am taking it the wrong way?" "what if I am expecting too much?" Who cares. Who cares if I expect too much. I have high standards on life. I play to win and I play for keeps. So come on, now. Come and get it. Take what is yours out of life.
Changes are coming. Hopefully courage will come following closely behind. I could use some ha.
I love you. With every breath.
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